Back in late 2018, everything felt slow. I was deep in the grind, staring down the barrel of another year doing the same stuff for the same people. You know the drill. You start looking for anything to give you a nudge, a sign. I didn’t usually pay attention to that zodiac junk, but I was bored enough to just type it in: Pisces career horoscope 2019.
I remember sitting right there at my kitchen table, coffee gone cold, just scrolling through these ridiculous articles. The one I locked onto was from some site with a starry background. It was full of the usual fluffy predictions. I didn’t save a screenshot or anything, but I vividly recall the big three they were hyping up for my sign:
The Garbage Predictions I Read That Day
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Major Financial Jump: Something about Jupiter’s placement meaning a huge salary spike or a bonus that would “change everything.”
I remember thinking, “Sure, maybe I’ll find twenty bucks in an old coat pocket.”
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A Complete Career Pivot: It predicted I would initiate a huge, sudden change in my industry or role, leading to “unprecedented fulfillment.”
I was working in mid-level project management. The most fulfilling thing I did that year was finally finishing a terrible Netflix series.
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A New Mentor or Boss: Someone crucial would step in around late summer and guide me to the next level.
Spoiler: The only new boss I got was a guy who liked to schedule meetings at 4:45 PM on a Friday.
I printed out the article just as a joke—a kind of morbid checklist. I stuck it to my corkboard behind a mountain of Post-it notes. Then I promptly forgot about it and got back to the miserable slog that was January 2019.
2019: The Year of Absolutely Nothing Happening
The year 2019 was a masterclass in mediocrity. I showed up, I sat down, and I did the work. The financial jump? Didn’t materialize. My annual raise was a whopping 1.8%, barely beating inflation. The “complete career pivot”? I just kept managing the same low-stakes crap. The new mentor? That 4:45 PM guy? He was actually the one blocking every good idea I had. I spent the entire year in a holding pattern, just trying to survive until the next vacation.
I was getting restless, though. Every time I looked at that article tacked up on the board, it just became more and more obvious that the universe didn’t give a damn about me being a Pisces. It was all nonsense. But the failure of the prediction ironically started to fuel something real.
The Real Life Crisis That Kicked Me Out
By early 2020, I was burned out. The horoscope had been a bust, sure, but seeing that “Major Financial Jump” prediction fail miserably just made me angrier about my actual paycheck. That was the real practical record I kept that year: a record of unfulfilled promises and stagnation.
I started logging off early, not because I was lazy, but because I was using that time to secretly teach myself new skills. I was diving into data analysis, something completely unrelated to my job. I didn’t tell anyone. It was just a way to channel the frustration I felt every time I had to sit through a meeting where someone said “synergy.”
The big, necessary change didn’t come from a benign universe or a lucky star, it came from a total dumpster fire. In March 2020, right when everything shut down, my whole department was restructured—which is just corporate speak for getting rid of the expensive middle managers. I got the call while sitting in my bedroom. I was laid off.
It was devastating, obviously. But after a week of panic, I pulled that old horoscope off the wall. I looked at the three predictions again. That’s when I had to laugh.
Did the Big Predictions Come True? (Eventually, and Accidentally)
Here’s how my actual record stacks up against the prediction. It all worked out, but only because I was forced into it by a global crisis and corporate cheapness, not by the stars.
- Major Financial Jump: True. I had to spend six months doing freelance data work, but because I had already secretly trained myself, I eventually landed a full-time role in that new field. My compensation for that new analyst role? It was well over the number I wished for back in 2019. The jump happened, but only because I was fired and forced to use the skills I had trained myself on in angry secrecy.
- A Complete Career Pivot: True. Project management to data analysis. Complete pivot. But the pivot wasn’t “initiated” by me for “fulfillment.” It was initiated by HR terminating me.
- A New Mentor or Boss: False. The best mentor I found was the guy who ran the online training course I paid for out of my own pocket. My new boss is fine, but they didn’t “guide me to the next level.” I just showed up already knowing the new job.
So, the predictions technically came true, but two years late, and only through the most stressful, unplanned way possible. The stars didn’t make it happen; they just acted as a stupid, flimsy piece of paper that annoyed me enough to get off my butt and start practicing new stuff while the old job was still paying the bills. That’s the real lesson I took from this silly experiment: don’t trust a horoscope to give you a big change. Trust the feeling of being mad about your situation, and then go do the heavy lifting yourself.
