Jumping into the Deep End: The May 2015 Fish Flip
I remember punching up that search query, “Career Horoscope Pisces May 2015.” I was absolutely sick of my life back then. Not just the job—that soul-crushing gig where they called you “team player” while making you work weekends for free—but the whole damn picture. I was looking for a sign, any sign at all, to just bail out. That’s the kind of desperation that lands you reading star signs at 2 AM on a Tuesday. I wanted the stars to tell me, “Dude, quit right now. Go buy a fishing boat.”
The site I landed on was some old-school thing, full of purple text and flashing GIFs. It was a proper mess, frankly. But I clicked on the Pisces section anyway. I was ready to throw my entire career in the garbage, but I figured I should at least check what kind of garbage the universe suggested.
The Reading and My Immediate Bad Call
The core message for May 2015 for my Fish sign, right? I printed it out, framed it, and used it as a coaster for cheap vodka for a few months.
- First thing it hit me with: “Focus on your established connections. Do not chase new horizons yet.”
- Second: “A crucial communication issue will surface around the 18th. Handle it with calm.”
- Third, the kicker: “You are planting seeds this month, not harvesting. Patience is key.”
Patience? Planting seeds? Listen, I was already five years into planting seeds, and all I had was a damn weed patch. That reading was telling me to sit tight. But my gut, the one fueled by instant noodles and too much rage, was screaming, “GET OUT!”
So, what did I do? I looked at that printout, laughed, and immediately started applying for every job I saw on the job boards. I didn’t care what they were. Customer service? Sure. Night shift security? Why not. If it paid the rent and wasn’t my current desk, I was hitting ‘Send.’ I was actively doing the opposite of “established connections” and “patience.” I was pure, unadulterated “new horizon chasing,” fuelled by pure spite for that horoscope.
The Great Unraveling: Reality Hits Harder Than Astrology
The result? Complete and total radio silence.
I applied to maybe twenty-five places between the 5th and the 20th of May. I didn’t get one email back. Not one automated “thanks but no thanks.” It was like I had been wiped off the internet. Then, around the 18th—remember the “crucial communication issue” the stars mentioned?
My boss, the absolute snake, pulled me into a meeting late on the 19th. No warning. He started talking about “restructuring” and “streamlining.” Yeah, I know what that means. He spent a solid twenty minutes talking about how much they valued my “years of service” before handing me a severance packet the size of a napkin. He even had the nerve to tell me, “This is a great chance for you to pursue those other interests you mentioned.” The bastard had been tracking my LinkedIn activity. That was the communication issue. It was brutal, quick, and left me feeling like a complete idiot for not reading the damn signs, literal or metaphorical.
I had no job, no prospects from my desperate applications, and a sudden, massive need for cash. My wife—girlfriend back then—was furious. We had just signed a new lease. The next few months were a blur of maxed-out credit cards and pretending to be busy during the day while she was at work. I was convinced the universe was actively punishing me for ignoring its terrible, purple-texted advice.
The Long Game and the Bitter Realization
It took me almost seven months to land a reliable, non-crap job. It wasn’t my dream job—far from it—but it was stable. And here’s where the real lesson, the one I only figured out years later, kicks in.
I found that old horoscope printout stuck inside a desk drawer during a move, maybe two years ago. It had vodka stains and was completely faded. I read it again, not through the lens of desperation, but through the lens of ten years of grinding.
The “established connections” it mentioned? My old college roommate was running a small side business in 2015. He reached out to me right after I got canned, offering me some freelance work. I told him I was too busy looking for a “real” job and blew him off. That side business? He sold it last year for enough cash to retire. If I had just focused on that connection, I’d have been golden.
The “patience”? If I hadn’t quit and just stayed put, playing the game for another six months, I’d have been eligible for a massive retirement contribution that I lost forever when I walked out. I was too hotheaded. I wanted the immediate satisfaction of slamming the door shut.
I realized the stars weren’t telling me what to do, but how to be. The practice wasn’t reading the sign; the practice was living through the consequences of ignoring it. The May 2015 career horoscope didn’t predict my future job title; it predicted my own predictable, impulsive idiocy. It was a roadmap of my own bad decisions. And that’s what sticks with me. I now actually check the readings, not to follow them, but to see what they tell me not to mess up this time. It took ten years and a whole lot of debt to finally figure out that simple truth.
Now, I’m just cruising, doing steady, boring work that pays the bills and lets me blog about my ridiculous past. That old company? They are still posting the same job, demanding the same long hours, and offering maybe 10% more pay than they did a decade ago. Every time I see the listing, I just shake my head and take a sip of coffee. I finally learned my lesson—but I had to go through hell to get it.
